I ran into Gregory who I hadn’t seen in years and he asked me out on a date. I was really excited to go out with Gregory because I had always thought he was charming; he was the kind of guy who was such a good flirter that he could make you blush and get butterflies, even though you knew he was probably flirting with everyone.

Hello. And now, he had asked me out. Exciting!

I met him at a restaurant because I think I was coming from somewhere – like teaching. At the time I taught drama to kids.

We had a really nice dinner, talking, laughing, flirting and then…

Gregory: Do you want to come back to my place.

Me: Sure.

I followed him to his place which was a nice little house not far from the restaurant. I walked inside and noticed the purple velvety furniture and the leopard print rugs and throw pillows. Kinda fem.

Me: Wow, you have very nice taste.

Gregory: (laughs) Oh yeah, not my stuff. It’s my roommates. Her furniture and stuff.

OK, a female roommate. Explains it.

Gregory: Want some wine?

He poured me a glass of really sweet wine. Again, kinda girly.

He put on music and turned it up loud. I waited for him to come sit next to me and make a move, but he stayed on the other side of the room and started dancing a little.

First he was just kind of bouncing to the beat and then he started putting a little elbow and shoulder into it. He wasn’t a great dancer, so I laughed. He was a funny guy. I thought he was trying to make me laugh, but then, he kept dancing for like 3 minutes. I couldn’t keep laughing through the whole song; it just wasn’t that funny. I sat awkwardly, waiting for the song to end.

Then the song ended and a new one came on – he danced to this one too, changing his dancing style to go with the song. Again, I sat watching, not knowing if it was a joke or if he was just having fun or what.

I should explain he wasn’t dancing like he was at a club or anything; he was dancing like he was performing for me. Not really Magic Mike, but more like Mike Meyers.

He was a four year old child doing a dance for the grownups.

Was this a date or what???

After about 5 songs of me watching him dance, I decided to get up and join him, you know, what else was I gonna do? I stood up and walked over to him. He backed away from me, in a moon walk dance move. Then he danced around me, circling me, with flair. It wasn’t flirty – it was just strange and annoying. I think about ten more minutes of his dancing around me, while I was just standing, went by.

Me: (loudly, shouting over music) I’m gonna go.

Gregory: OK.

And then he took my arm and placed my hand on my own hip. He took my other arm and put my hand on my head. He had put me into a little cute position. Then he danced around me again. Maybe he had taken some shrooms when he went in to get me my super sweet wine.

Then he put me into a new pose, this time, placing one of my own hands on my breast. I just stared at him. If he knew he was being annoying, he didn’t let on. Was he a just freak? Was he actually not attracted to me but invited me over not expecting me to say yes? Was this roommate with nice furniture and sweet wine actually a girlfriend and he was having second thoughts about me being there?

Me: OK. Um, bye.

I walked to the door and he followed me, dancing.

Gregory: OK. Um… do you-

I have no idea what he was going to say because I ran out the door. Maybe he was going to say, Do you want me to walk you to your car? Do you wanna hang out again? But more likely, Do you think I’m a good dancer?

What do you think he was going to say?